"Would ya just lookit 'er," I followed Spot's gaze. Even though there were a bunch of girls in the cafeteria, I knew who he was talking about when I saw her. "She's like poifect, ya know, only not poifect."
I sighed, "Spot, I don't see why you don't just ask her out, you have liked her since kindergarten for cripes sake." I laughed, remembering this summer, "Although, after what she did this last summa, I'm surprised ya still like 'er."
He glared at me, "I doan like 'er, I admiah the way she is, the way she doan take crap from people, and de way she does what she wants, wid not a caih in de woild as ta who takes offense ta it."
I smiled, he was cute when he was defensive, his Brooklyn accent really showed through. "Don't deny it, you like her, even if she called the cops on ya for drinkin' whiles you're only seventeen."
He shook his head smiling a little sadly, his sandy blond hair falling into his blue gray eyes that looked like the ocean. "I swear ta yas, Mush, I doan like 'er, 'least not the way youse t'inks I does. I admiah the way she always tells de truth and de way she stands up fo' what she believes in. Besides, I like someones else, like the ways you t'ink I likes 'er."
I laughed, he was soundin' slightly shy, and I saw a blush creep into his cheeks. "Oh, yeah. Youse gots a crush on somes oddah goil, Spotty." I mimicked his accent as best I could.
"No, I doan." I laughed again, as his blush deepened.
"You either do or ya don't, Spot, and if ya don't that means ya do like her. If ya do like someone else, then it's another girl." I said slightly sadly at the truth in it. Spot Conlon was a skirt chaser, and I knew this because he was one of my best friends; and I was in love with him.
"Changin' subject, you hear from Blink at all?" He said, smiling. I smiled back.
"Ah, letsee, he was at my house last night, same time you were. And, hmm, haven't seen him all day, wonder why that is. Oh yeah he's home-schooled." I said, mock-serious. "Original subject, who's it that ya like?"
"I ain't gonna tell ya dat, 'cause ya wouldn't like dat I like 'em and ya'd soak me for likin' 'em." He said, avoiding eye-contact by looking at his food, but I could still see a slight blush form on his cheeks. "Besides, Mush, subject changed, remember?"
I sighed, "Yeah, I 'members. Why'd ya ask about Blink?"
He didn't get to answer, because we heard some giggling girls behind me, followed by "Sorry, to interrupt your conversation, guys, but... Well, I was wondering if you would like to go out with me, Mush." This was followed by more giggles.
I turned to face Spot's almost 'poifect goil'. "I'm sorry, Laura, but I can't."
Her eyes flared, but only for a second. "One more question, and then I'll leave ya alone about it, 'kay?" I nodded and she continued, "Why not?"
I bit my lip, she always spoke the truth, making it difficult to lie to her. "Look, you're nice and all, I wouldn't mine being friends, but just believe me when I say I can't." I didn't want to tell her I was gay.
"That's not a good enough reason, and you know it." She said.
I shook my head and said, "It's not a reason, but I don't want to give you the reason and I don't wanna tell ya something stupid like my parents don't want me datin' yet. So, please just believe that I can't." I wanted her to not push the issue.
"Laura, he doesn't want ya, so's jist leave him alone." Spot said sharply.
Her eyes narrowed towards Spot, but she didn't say anything to him, instead she returned to me and said, "If ya don't like me just tell me that."
"It's not that I don't like you, like I said you're nice, but I just don't like girls that way." I said before I could stop it, my hand flying to my mouth a moment to late to stop the words.
I thought I heard Spot mumble, "Cool."
Laura raised an eyebrow, "I see, you play for the other team." She smiled, and turned to walk away. "Good luck, Mush, your good lookin' enough that the other team'll play for you as well."
She walked back to the girls that had come with her and they walked back to their table. I turned slowly back in my chair.
I didn't want to face Spot. He was the only one of the people I trusted who didn't know I was gay. My whole family knew I was gay, Blink knew I was gay, Blink even knew that I had a crush on Spot. Him being the in-between-neighbor of Spot and I, he was our best friend, and he saw the signs before I had.
"Mush?" Spot asked. I didn't look up, instead I poked at my mashed potatoes on my tray.
"Yeah, Spot?" I said without looking up, no way was I going to do that. I didn't want his ocean eyes to storm over when he asked if I was really that way.
"You really 'playin' for the other team' ta use Laura's woids?" He asked, like I knew he would.
I nodded, "Yeah, Spot."
"Good." I heard a grin in his voice. I looked up and saw said grin playing across his lips.
"What... Whaddya mean?" I asked nervously
"Whadda I mean? I's means good. I'm glad youse not a skoit chasah." He said, leanin' back in his chair, the smile never leavin' his beautiful face. "So's ya gotcha eyes on anybody?"
I stared at him, I couldn't believe he was so easy about me likin' guys. I nodded, knowin' his next question was who and if I told him truthfully, he'd hate me for it.
"Well, who is it?" He asked, leaning forward. "Is it Blink?"
The smile never left his voice or his face, I looked back down at my mashed potatoes. I don't know why I grabbed mashed potatoes, I didn't even like them. They were from the Irish and the only thing I liked from the Irish, was sitting across from me, smiling and waiting for me to answer.
Without looking up, I responded quietly, "No, not Blink."
"Den it's one of de guys from school." I nodded hesitantly. "Mush, I knows all de guys in school, and if I'se doan, I'se got little boidies ta info'm meh of who I'se doan know."
He wouldn't need his little 'boids'. He knew all the guys I knew. "I know ya do, Spot."
"Mush, if you don't tell me, I'll guess, eithah way I will find out who ya like." I smiled, he would never guess himself.
I looked up at him, "Guess, I don't believe ya can guess him."
He smiled back, the corners of his mouth turning up, a glint of mischief in his eyes. "Is it Skittery from Chemistry?"
I leaned back in my chair, still smiling, "Nope, ain't Skittery."
"How's about Snitch?" I shook my head, "Jack?" Again, I shook my head. "Snoddy? Snipeshooter? Bumlets?" I shook my head at all three.
He continued to guess and I continued to smile and shake my head. He finally was getting down to the last of the guys we both knew.
"Davey? Crutchy? Specs? Dutchy? Oscar? Morris? Boots? Itey? Jake? Pie-Eater? Racetrack? Tumbler? Swifty? Blanket?"
I smiled, "That's almost all the guys I know, and the only one you missed is the guy I like."
I watched as he went back over the list in his head trying to figure out who he missed. "That's all the guys that I know you know. Are you sure I missed one?"
His ocean eyes sparkled and narrowed as he grew frustrated that he didn't know who it was. His lithe body relaxed back in his chair, if ya didn't know him you would think him just like any lazy guy. But he was ready to fight if need be, he was also ready to do anything he pleased. He pondered over the list again.
"Help meh out, Mush. I knows every guy you knows, and it ain't any o' de ones I says." He watched for signs of confirmation, and I nodded along with what he said.
Suddenly, his eyes brightened. He looked at me smiling, "De only guy I didn't say," He hesitated, and his smile faltered slightly. "De only guy I didn't say," He leaned forward, beckoned me closer as well, so he could almost whisper it to me, "Was me."
My brain told me to nod or say some sort of confirmation, but my body refused. Finally, I managed to nod. He sat back in his chair. I followed suit. He grinned at me.
"Good." He said again.
I raised my eyebrow. "Good?"
He nodded, "Good."
I looked down at my food, "You don't hate me for likin' ya?"
He laughed. "Hate ya for it? Nah! Ifin ya doan mind me sayin' I likes ya even moah fo' it."
I looked back up at him, confused. "Ya doan have ta have a crush on a 'goil', ya knows, Mush."
I understood what he meant by that. He was gay too!! "I know."
"So, happens somewhehs 'long de way, I'se started crushin' on youse, Mush." My heart soared, I smiled at him.
"Well, then there's only one thing left ta say." I said, keepin' the smile.
"Wanna go out wid meh?" Throwin' my best Brooklyn accent in.
He smiled, his ocean eyes laughing.
Ocean Eyes and Mashed Potatoes by cassy1994